I am alive and so sorry I have not read my f'list or commented.
The boys and I are doing well, but things got a little shaky and I still have not written about it and I need to. I will. We had to define what our relationship is, in a way we would all be happy, and my mind got expanded. But I think theirs did too, especially Toby.
Last night was beautiful. We went to The Plaza, a famous area of Kansas City, and looked at all the gorgeous lights and took a carriage ride all around and boggled the driver, but he had the total class not to say anything. The boys insisted that I be in the middle, but after a while I insisted Toby be in the middle. I am growing and I NEED this to work.
We made beautiful love last night. And I told the boys what their major Christmas present is.
I am off the pill.
Whew. Crying here. This is a big step. They cried and made love to me again. We don't want a paternity test. That is putting the cart before the horse though, heh?
They are asleep, all spooned hot and gorgeous and when I looked at them together I started crying again. As soon as I am done here, I am making biscuits and sausage gravy. Screw calories and carbs!
Mom is coming for dinner, and I hope things won't be tense. She is asking questions and I am trying to be gentle and ease this on her. She can be pretty conservative. I don't know what the consequences could be.
I will trust in God and the Universe that all will be well.
Love to you all!